


In One Another's Being Mingle

by Perfica



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: 1000-3000 words, Angst, Established Relationship, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-17
Updated: 2007-10-17
Packaged: 2017-10-14 11:23:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/148749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Perfica/pseuds/Perfica
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the mcsmooch October 2007 kissing challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In One Another's Being Mingle

John had just finished straightening the covers on his painfully short bed when Rodney barged into his room, waving his hand over the sensor to close the door then pressing a couple of almost invisible buttons until the lights around the frame blinked red.

"There," he said, turning and placing a heavy looking bag on the floor with a satisfied grin. "All locked up for the night."

"Hey," John said, suddenly, stupidly, nervous. He cleared his throat and checked that all the candles were still alight. "You got here on time."

"Like I was going to be late for this! I'm not a complete social moron."

Now that John could get a better look at him, he could see that Rodney wasn't as blasé as he'd first appeared. He was shifting slightly from one foot to the other, almost as if he needed to run to the bathroom. The colour was high on his face and it made the thin layer of perspiration around his hairline glitter in the candlelight.

"Maybe we should - " John started to say.

"I brought supplies," Rodney interrupted. He waved a hand at the bulging backpack on the floor. "Those salted bagel things you seem to like, a couple of bottles of water, a fruit cup or two. Some fresh vegetable sticks but the cucumbers looked soggy so I got extra carrots. I wasn't sure how long we'd be in here for so... "

John felt his face relaxing into a grin for the first time all day. "Relax, Rodney. We're spending a night in, not attempting to conquer K2. I've got snacks too."

"You do?" For the first time since whirling into John's room, Rodney almost looked like his usual self. "Do you have any chocolate raisins left, because I'm sure Ronon - ?"

"Shhh," John said, crossing the room easily and clasping both of Rodney's hands between his own. They were damp, and John wasn't sure if that was his or Rodney's fault.

"Are we really going to do this?" Rodney whispered.

John licked his lower lip, inhaled deeply through his nose and nodded decisively. "I'm ready if you are."

"Your room looks really nice," Rodney said, looking as though he should have said something earlier.

"Thanks," John said, squeezing Rodney's hands. "Listen - "

"You first," Rodney blurted out. At John's raised eyebrow he continued, "Not that I don't want to, of _course_ I want to, I never would have agreed or... or _encouraged_ if it wasn't something I wanted too. It's just that you've had experience in this type of thing before." Rodney winced at John's slightly pained expression. "I probably shouldn't have brought that up?"

"Probably not."

"Okay, sorry, won't happen again. I just - "

John leant over and placed his nose right near Rodney's ear, almost as if he were breathing in Rodney's scent.

"John?"

"Rodney? Can we start so we can get this over and done with?"

"Sure, sure," Rodney agreed, nodding furiously. "I'll just shut up now and you can - " he waved his right hand, still trapped in John's, around in an aborted gesture, "get to it."

"Get to it," John mumbled under his breath, shaking his head. He sighed, stood straighter and looked Rodney squarely in the eye. Rodney had no choice but to look back.

"McKay... Rodney," John released one of Rodney's hands and scrubbed the back of his neck. Rodney took the opportunity to surreptitiously wipe his sweaty palm on his thigh before their hands rejoined. "I think I should just get it out there."

"You do that," Rodney said, aware of the quaver in his voice. "Just, you know, say what you've got to - "

"I love you," John said. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he froze, staring at Rodney with wide eyes.

"That's - that's."

"I love you, Rodney," John repeated, widening his stance. "And I don't say it enough because I'm not so good with the whole... saying things out loud and planning stuff so you should, you know, know that I do."

"Okay," Rodney said. "Communication received. Message logged."

"Don't geek out on me," John warned.

"I'm not, just, you know, hurry the hell up."

"I'm probably never going to do this again so let me get it right, okay? So, anyway. Love. I, ah, have a great love for you. And I know you feel something for me because you, you know, hang around me and stuff. Sorta like Ronon. Only not like Ronon because of the whole sex thing."

"Sheppard - "

"What I'm _trying_ to say is: sometimes I think you're a real pain in the ass. And sometimes I'd rather listen to Teyla tell me stories about growing up as an Athosian teenage girl than have to listen to you talk about, well, a lot of the things you wanna talk about. And I'm no princess but your table manners leave a lot to be desired. And I know - " John said, forestalling Rodney's open mouth and many, many possible objections, "that I'm no prize myself. I can be a little... detached sometimes. Stand-offish."

John stepped right up into Rodney's space and continued in a low voice. "But here's the thing, McKay. It doesn't matter what you do, or how you act, or how you think you look - I never want spend a day apart from you. And whether that's here in the Pegasus Galaxy or back on Earth; stuck on an abandoned planet or slumming it in the back of your crappy Honda because you've gotten us kicked out of our own place, I want to be with you. Until... well, you know. Until one of us isn't around anymore. 'Cause I love you."

Rodney swallowed heavily and looked down. He squeezed John's hands, almost painfully tight. "Thank you. That must have been really hard for you - "

"Oh, no," John said, taking a step back. "You are _not_ chickening out of this. We agreed that we'd both - "

"Ah, come on! How can I top that? I _told_ you you'd be better at this sort of stuff than me. There's nothing I can say that'll - "

"This isn't a competition, Rodney," John drawled. "Spill your guts. Fair's fair."

"Just this one time? And, you know, again in the future if the mood takes us?"

"Just this once. Let me know just this once how you, you know - hell, are you going to make me say it?"

"No, no, no," Rodney said appeasingly. "You don't have to make me; I want to do this. Just, come here, okay?"

He held out his arms and John, after a brief moment, slid into his embrace, settling into the hug and they locked together as sweetly as they always did.

"Like this," Rodney said, murmuring in John's ear. "I want to do it like this."

"It still means something even if I can't see your face," John teased.

"I know," Rodney said, chuckling. "I just want to be able to concentrate and I can't if you're standing there looking delectable right in front of me."

"I'm wearing a polo shirt and sweat pants."

"The costume of lounging. As I said, delectable."

John laughed quietly against Rodney's neck and Rodney shut his eyes tight.

"It's not that I'm embarrassed," Rodney said, lips moving rapidly against the curve of John's ear. "How could I be when you... you... you're _you_. Every time you look at me I get this funny feeling in the bottom of my stomach and I've finally worked out what it is. It's joy. I'm joyful... because you..." and the words were spilling out of Rodney's mouth almost like he couldn't control what he was saying. "Everything you do and everything you say; the way you walk and the way you operate a keyboard like you've only just discovered the benefits of opposable thumbs. Your voice first thing in the morning and your off-tune humming last thing at night. The way you get pissed off at me on missions and the way you save me a seat in the mess and you don't even know you're doing it! How could I - " his voice broke. John squeezed him tighter. "How could I not love someone like you? Not someone - _you_. You're everything that's right in my life and I don't, I wouldn't want to be away from that for a second. A millisecond. Not for anything - "

"McKay," John said, warm hands bracketing Rodney's face, forehead pressed against Rodney's furrowed brow. "It's alright."

"Don't ever doubt that you are the most important thing in my life, okay? No matter what I say or how angry or forgetful I get, don't forget this. I wish I could make you feel what I feel."

"I know," John said. "I really, really know." And his mouth lowered and Rodney felt the briefest caress of lips brush past his own.

"I love you, you know," Rodney pushed out with the last of his breath.

John's lips were soft and delicate, the complete opposite of the hands that now supported the back of Rodney's head, the base of his spine. They moved slowly, as if this kiss was something to remember, something unique in the thousands of kisses they'd already shared and the millions that would comprise their future.

Rodney couldn't help but smile, even though it made kissing John back difficult, because they did it, they finally got it all out and they never had to second-guess anymore.

There wasn't one single thing holding them back anymore.

Rodney couldn't stop smiling so John pulled back, grinning as well. "Okay?"

"Absolutely. Top notch."

"Told you it wouldn't be so bad."

"Tell someone who doesn't know you," Rodney said, rolling his eyes. "I thought you were going to chuck when I walked into the room."

"Hey, is that anyway to speak to someone on their wedding night?"

"It is, isn't it?" Rodney said, jaw dropping open. "I mean, it's the closest thing we're ever going to get - "

"Yeah, sorry about that," John shrugged, seemingly embarrassed about his job.

"Not your fault," Rodney said, dismissing the line of thought. "I knew that when we first started."

"I wish... nah, stupid thought."

"What do you wish?"

John's hands trailed down Rodney's arms and his lowered eyes followed their movement. "When I did this, you know, the last time - "

"Her," Rodney said, trying to keep his tone neutral.

"Yeah, her," John said. "There was a whole bunch of people there. Friends, family, that sort of thing. It was kinda..."

"Nice?"

"Stupid, huh?" John chuckled, although his laugh was strained.

"Would it make it more real for you?"

"No! No, buddy, I didn't mean it like that - "

"Because I think it would have been nice to have Teyla here, you know? She probably would have gotten a kick out of seeing you say so much, and Ronon would have smirked the whole way through. I'm sure Radek would have called me the blushing bride; that would have made his month."

John was smiling again, so Rodney knew he was saying the right things. "Bride, huh?"

"Certainly not. And certainly not blushing. Maybe stammering and sweating and, and, trying not to throw up on your shiny dress shoes, but no blushing. I'm not embarrassed by anything I've said tonight."

"Really?" John asked, a shy look of delight suffusing his face.

"Just you put me in front of a crowd," Rodney said, drawing John into his arms again. "I'll tell the whole world."

This time their kiss was deeper, wetter, harder, longer - but just as filled with joy.


End file.
